Self-Portrait in Scars
It’s 5:00 PM in my last daydream of the day, and I wish to hell it would never end. A revulsion has taken over and it’s all I can do to not vomit my contempt of the idiots in charge. When egos take over and the welfare of society takes not second place but last place, we cannot let it continue. I look in the mirror to paint my last self-portrait.
There is, in a scar, a memory of an event. It is a reminder that you did something, perhaps not your own fault, but there it is. It’s always there. My face looks back at me and it is sadly unrecognizable. The shame is there, scars of feelings that will never disappear. It’s me and it’s not and that is a terrible feeling.
I remember when I was a kid. Kids rarely look in mirrors because it’s not important to them. They simple want to do things, anything. I regret old age as if it is something I could have changed long ago. It isn’t, but then I think again and I realize I could have.
Climb up
Reach back into yesterday
Crack open the dawn
Launch rockets to forever
Level the ground
Walk the intrepid roads
Salute those who came before you
Initiate joy
Crystalize the soul
Forever smile
Illuminate in reflections
Demand the goodness
In others
Accent the emphasis
Emphasize your despair
As drama in recompense
The average is
The multiple good
Overlook the pain
By joy in your face
Ignore the scars
Use your advantage
Treasure every moment
Give everything to
Every person you
See.
Bennie lives in New Mexico where the sun gives its nourishment to everyone almost every day. His work will be appearing in an upcoming Grey Borders Anthology entitled Daddy: A Cultural Anthology and has recently been published in New World Writing.
